


How to Survive the Hiatus in 18 Easy Steps

by HouseOfTucker_Archivist



Category: Star Trek: Enterprise
Genre: Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-05
Updated: 2021-02-05
Packaged: 2021-03-17 15:15:40
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 574
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29227581
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HouseOfTucker_Archivist/pseuds/HouseOfTucker_Archivist
Summary: Because 12 steps ain't enough!
Kudos: 1





	How to Survive the Hiatus in 18 Easy Steps

1\. Watch your taped eps:  
a) in order  
b) in order of TripQuotient (most to least, least to most)  
c) only the ones that suit your personal 'shipper fantasy  
d) in order of the number of articles of clothing Trip removes during the episode  
e) watch the reruns

2\. Visit the BBSTucker daily to post ON topic. (Trip) Search for other websites, like Connor's, or This One. Help Myst and I compile stuff for our website. Contribute to PROJECT TUCKER and visit House of Tucker regularly. http://www.houseoftucker.com

3\. Go to a convention to meet Our Man Trinneer. Compliment him on his exceptional acting skills, not his fine, fine body. OR: Compliment him on his fine, fine body, and be prepared for the consequences. Alternatively, write CT a fan letter (too geeky?) or find out what he's up to on hiatus himself.

4\. Print out a picture of Trip and put it on your:  
a) fridge  
b) bedside table (NOT for those with S.O.s!)  
c) front lawn, in flowers (Texas bluebonnets for the eyes)  
d) ceiling of your bedroom, just over the bed.  
e) glue it to a roll-up shade so you can hide it from S.O., but roll it down when you're alone

5\. Try to develop a north-Florida, south-Oklahoma, west-Tennessee, central-Arkansas kinda accent.

6\. Reflect on Trip's influence on your life since September 2001. Reflect on BBSTucker's influence on your life since February 2002. Which has done more damage?

7\. Speculate wildly about the upcoming seasons, especially Trip's next stories. WILDLY, I said.

8\. Buy yourself / your man some tight blue boxer-briefs. Is it the same? Really?

9\. Kneel before the ListMoms (at your shrine at home), without whom we'd have a lot more work done by now. Mar suggests sacrificing a small brown furry creature from Alpha Centauri.

10\. Imagine Commander Tucker stopping by your place. Would he be impressed?

11\. It's just a TV show. It's just a TV show. (Intone repeatedly until you realize that it is, in fact, *not* just a TV show anymore.)

12\. Can *your * eyebrows do this? / . . \ His can. Work on it.

13\. Share your obsession (...no...) addiction (...no...) FOCUSED INTENSITY with one other person. Either as confessional or as proselytizing, your choice. Spread the love.

14\. Do not turn from the faith, my child. There is none so wicked as a fallen Trip Fan. If you waver, grab hold of the remote or the mouse (or the mousse -- spike *your* hair up!)

15\. Cultivate a taste for any food Trip has mentioned. Extra points for foods you wouldn't have even considered eating before. This includes:

a. pan-fried catfish (cornmeal coating)  
b. pecan pie  
c. prime rib  
d. mashed potatoes  
e. cherry sno-cones (bonus points for wearing a Hawaiian shirt)  
f. rocky road ice cream  
g. bourbon

16\. Body part of the month, June, July, and August! The more mature among us can vote for "Trip's Greatest Acting Scene of the month."

17\. Meet another member of the BBS in person.

18\. He'll be back in September. Honest. We can make it.

_Mr. Atoz laments,"If we focus on a different body part each day, I'm afraid we'll run out before the summer's over. We'd have to start repeating certain parts. Oh, wait...not such a bad idea."_

_Lo Pan comments: "Ya preaching to the converted. (Is it wrong that over half of those 18 tips naturally occurred to me?)_


End file.
